I'm in line at the gas station earlier tonight. There's a gal in front of me picking up a few items. I glance at what she's buying, and have to force myself to keep a straight face. She finishes paying and leaves. As I place my coffee on the counter, I can't help it anymore. I burst out laughing. The cashier asks, "What's so funny?"
"That, there, was almost every man's dream."
She raises and eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
"A chick who runs to the store to pick up cigarettes and condoms."
"Oh." She chuckles. "Almost every man's dream? It's not your dream?"
"No," I reply. "Rule number one. I don't date smokers."
Rimshot! Exit sliding door left!